“Comparison is the thief of joy.” – Theodore Roosevelt
Lately I’ve been comparing myself to just about everything and everyone. Not in terms of material possessions. No I’m being rather tough on myself professionally, physically and emotionally. A few random thoughts that have gone through my head in the last few days include:
“She is as tall as I am but look out thin she is. Why can’t I look like that? I bet she eats like a horse too!”
“How come I can’t be invited to a press junket or conference? What happened to my years of hard work? I guess nobody reads my blog!”
“Those women are so lucky and amazing. I used to be like them.”
“Everyone invites her to this party, this group, this event and look at fat Sommer…staying home alone and doing nothing but checking her Facebook.”
Really! These are just random thoughts going through my head because I’m comparing myself to just about anyone and everyone I see. On Facebook, Instagram, on the street or in the grocery store. I look in the mirror and I’m critiquing myself and telling myself my skin is awful, my hair is flat and my tummy is too big. My arms are gross and my thighs are cottage cheese. Not one nice word or thought to myself.
If something goes astray, I blame myself. My son forgets his shoes; I must have forgotten to remind him. My husband is hungry; I didn’t get the food on the table in time. My daughter has a meltdown, I missed the signs she was tired or over stimulated. I blame myself for everything short of the sun not shinning. I say to myself the other mom’s and wives must be better at this.
Again, comparing myself over-and-over!
I’m not sure how to make it stop but I know it is stealing my joy. I can’t be happy with myself or what I’m doing and accomplishing by always reflecting outward and not inward. I’m failing to see anything good in myself or my abilities and accomplishments shinning a light on everyone else and anybody else but myself.